That is just... RURNT

Today, after way too many years neglected, our septic tank was pumped. I was thankfully not present at the time, but my wife related to me personally that it was not a pleasant sight (nor smell) to behold. She made at least two memorable (I'm sure) mistakes, which I shall relate to you heretofore.

Firstly, she didst maketh a visit unto the excavation site thereto. Whereupon she witnesseth the pile o' ... well... you know what she witnesseth. By her own report we had almost waited too late, if ya know whut I mean. Verily.

Secondly, she didst leave yon bedroom window open. For to let yon spring breeze waft through yon house. Which it didst, howsomeever the kids didst begin to hack and gag and run away as fast as their little legs could carry them. For sooth.

As you can plainly see, my wife made several foreseeable and easily avoidable mistakes today. There is one mistake that I thankfully did not make, and that was to become a septic tank vacuum cleaner person-type. My wife related to me, personally, how the poo professional kept a close watch over the proceedings, and repeatedly poked and prodded with his poo poker, making certain that everything was perfectly and properly purged.

There are a million more things I could say now that are, quite frankly, better left unsaid. But I will say that it's just such a good feeling to know that your septic tank is pristine clean. I wonder how many of you dear readers can say the same?